I got a long written letter from Lauren this week. It was so good! She said I could share some of it with you:
Hi, Mom!
It’s Christmas Eve. I’m sitting in the dark living room, with the blanket I stole from our living room couch, with a hot chocolate & a great view of the baby Tannenbaum the branch gave us. I opened one of my packages as my Christmas Eve present. J
On July 23 you wrote me all about RAGBRAI. Wow, sounds so warm! Then you wrote me about allowing God to mold me—becoming malleable in His Master hands. I wanted you to know that that inspiration has been guiding me for 6 months now. It made the currant bush story (http://www.lds.org/new-era/1973/01/the-currant-bush?lang=eng) really become written on my heart. I’ve felt so often that I’ve hit a brick wall in trying to learn what I think I need to learn, & then I remember God is the gardener here, & all I’m in charge of is allowing Him to shape me.
Like when I first got my companion I thought I was supposed to be working on learning how to work harder, faster. To find. To balance responsibility. Turns out I’d already learned that enough but hadn’t stopped yet, so God gave me a companion who wasn’t happy when I did the things I thought I needed to work on—like following the schedule exactly, to the minute. After a very frustrating month, I gave up & went with the flow. And God taught me patience, charity, kind words, listening. So much more important. So much more eternal.
At a zone conference we studied the difference between ministering & administering. My last paragraph illustrates that.
You wrote about “Be not weary in well-doing” & “Do not run faster than you have strength.” Then you jokingly said, “If that were really true, then when I felt tired I could just stop!” But what it really is, is that if you are running faster than you have strength, you’re not running where or how God wants. Because with God’s strength you can run a marathon. If your strength is failing, stop. Look at your trail & your pace. Realign them to God’s will, move forward. And you can be tired & still have strength! I relearn that every stinking day.
At some point you said, “I wish that were true. I felt it was true when I was praying.” That reminds me of a quote a missionary once shared: “True character is when you follow a prompting even when you’re no longer feeling prompted.” So hard though!
On the back of his letter I wrote “Helaman 10:4.” Let’s see what that says! “Blessed art thou, Nephi, for those things which thou hast done; for I have beheld how thou hast with unwearyingness declared the word, which I have given unto thee, unto this people. And thou hast not feared them, and hast not sought thine own life, but hast sought my will, and to keep my commandments.” Oh. Ok. This basically sums up everything I just said. And I wrote Matthew 19:29 in the margin, “And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name’s sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life.”
That reminds me: I loved the last verse of D&C 123 that you wrote on my Christmas chain (I love every single part of that gift, thank you so much.) “Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.” I found D&C 78:17-18 which is my current favorite scripture. “Be of good cheer, for I will lead you along.” So good! Be of good cheer. I will lead you along.
On 4 May 1987 [I sometimes send Lauren letters or journal entries from my mission], you were sharing a 2 bedroom apt. with 6 people! Ahh! You ate Churrasco—that must be where Churrascaria comes from! You wrote, “I hope ____’s happy, happiness is the most important thing!” That’s so TRUE! Like with roommates/companions—it doesn’t matter what I trying to help her understand, if she’s not happy she won’t hear it, so I have to help her be happy & then I can lovingly correct her. And with my calling [as sisters trainer], my #1 responsibility is to help my sisters be happy. I love it! I’m also surprised by what makes me happy. Usually it’s doing really hard things.
On September 19 you sent me a snippet from your first week in Brazil; on the back you wrote that on your mission you prayed for East Germany to be opened to missionary work. Tada!!! Br. Schumann, in our branch, served in this area, from Chemnitz. He wasn’t ordained to an elder or set apart as a missionary until after he’d been on his mission over 6 months!! And at one point he was stationed in the mission office for night watch duty because the police were trying to sneak contraband Books of Mormon (printed in the West) into the office so they could shut down the church! Ahh!!
…[referring to thoughts from June 2012 “Hastening the Work” broadcast] When Pres. Monson said, “Wishing will not make it so” I knew it was true. It’s pretty obvious-sounding. But on my mission I’ve learned to understand the real connection between faith & action. When you truly believe something will happen, really truly, you act as if it’s already the case! I hope I can find this reference…YES! Mosiah 16:6 “And now if Christ had not come into the world, speaking of things to come as though they had already come, there could have been no redemption.” Abinadi was to utterly convinced that Christ would truly come (& had probably already felt the Atonement in his life) that he spoke as if it had already happened. And so of course you’ll actaccordingly, and so that thing will truly happen, because of your actions. Get the vision, live the vision.
The other side is that talk from a sister last conference about how if you want to know if something is really from God you can’t just ask Him, you have to try it out too!
So acting & faith feed each other, growing brighter & brighter until the perfect day. Oh, or was that light? (It’s all the same thing.)
Dad said recently that a mission tends to allow the unimportant things in life to fall away. I’m not sure if he was being deep or commenting on my hair, but he’s right. When we focus only on what God’s directing our focus to, if we stop looking the right & to the left, we’ll do the most important things in the proper balance for that moment—everything in its season. So in this season God allowed for us to have very few people we’re responsible for so that we could focus on helping my companion overcome obstacles in a positive, building-up (germanism) way.
I repent of my sparse emailing. I can never remember anything that I’ve thought about or experienced as soon as I sit down at the computer. *sigh*
Merry Christmas! Can’t wait to open my presents -- & can’t wait to send yours on Monday. J Sorry! I’ve had some…weird P-days recently.
Lots of love,
Sis. Teusch
